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"Nostalgic Dial-up modem sound"

(Source: bonsjoard, via thisisfactnotfictionn)

So tempted to talk to him even though we’ve never talked before.

During a Period

Uterus: I hope you didn't like those underwear.
Stomach: EAT ALL THE THINGS!
Emotions: I don't care that you were crying your eyes out ten minutes ago, that was fucking funny. Now go act like you're high until I see something that pisses me the fuck off.
Stomach: ESPECIALLY THE CHOCOLATY THINGS!
Uterus: Also I've decided to act like something's constantly punching me. I hope you don't mind.
Me: why can I not have a penis.

NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY